Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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