The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
