if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
