I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
