I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
