it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
