Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Randomize
