do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
zippers are such a cool invention
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize