Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
