soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
