ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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