My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
