I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Two words: blizzard sex
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
