life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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