There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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