please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
