I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize