so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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