I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
