my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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