I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
