I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
