Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize