Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
