haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just high enough for therapy.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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