I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Someone shattered a urinal.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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