I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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