i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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