Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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