Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize