It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
this just has baby written all over it
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Randomize
