Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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