check it out our google latitudes are spooning
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Randomize
