If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
