let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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