Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
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