I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
