I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Just fell off a train. Bad.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
sex in a hospital.. check
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
FUCK WHALES
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
