Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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