you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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