dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
