my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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