So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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