My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
