Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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