I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
