Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
its liver damage thursday
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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