I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
