There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
