We tried having a conversation with our noses.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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