and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
